Skip to main content

Citizens of Heaven: reflections on how the lack of speaking and understanding a language make me a foreigner.



I have experienced life as a foreigner in varying degrees over the majority of my life, probably beginning on my first short term missions trip (to Uganda) 22 years ago (yes, 22 years…yikes!). I don’t recall feeling so much a foreigner on that trip, but I was changed, and became a distinct “foreigner” upon my return to Canada. I think it was then that I began to learn how to die to myself and began to desire to live out James 1:27 (in it’s entirety – I yearned to live out true religion by taking care of orphans and widows AND by remaining unpolluted by the secular world)

*note: I am far from perfect, and simultaneously began a fight against sin, as once convicted of something, once one knows the good that they should do and they do not do it, they then sin… the struggle against the flesh is real, but with every victory, as sin is put to death and as I choose to live life in the Spirit, I am learning more and more how to live a life separate from the world.   


I have experienced life as a spiritual foreigner as well as an actual foreigner. I enjoy spending time with people of different cultures as well as visiting different places and learning how to live alongside different people and cultures. And, as all marriages are to some degree, I have learnt (am learning) communication between different cultures, different (English) languages, and between the male and female heart/mind.

I find it (relatively) easy to fit in with Africans (or at least fellow Christians from both East and West Africa - and love the opportunity that we have in the Greater Vancouver area of BC, to meet and do life with so many cultures!). 

 The biggest challenge for me is always the language. Even where I can speak the language, like with Spanish (and English!), there are aspects of how language is affected by culture, and where communication may not flow smoothly when speaking a mutually-understood language with someone of another culture.

I am feeling that right now more than ever before, as we visit family in Uganda. The Apostle Paul talks about language in 1 Corinthians 14. He is more specifically writing about speaking in “tongues”, and having order and translation/interpretation in the Church, but he refers to the importance of understanding each other, and how lack of knowing a language makes us foreigners.

I have never been made so aware of how much I am a foreigner than these past few weeks, at home with my husband’s family in Acowa, Uganda. I am yearning for fellowship in English, and am made aware of how much the inability to communicate in a common language makes us feel like foreigners. The only time that I (we) have word-for-word translation is at Church, but otherwise, we sometimes have the gist of something translated, but are mostly “in the dark” about what is being said. Of course, my husband can speak English and knows how to translate, but he is working on finishing the house for my in-laws), and two of my sisters-in-law (who live at home in the village) can speak English and translate basics, but they are not very talkative (though, getting better) ;)

We had an amazing visit with our dear friends Shadrach and Sarah the other weekend, in Kobwin. They are all from the same tribe, have the same culture, foods, and mother-tongue, but they speak English! It was such a blessing to sit down and visit with Sarah (and also debrief a bit with her too!), speaking the same language makes a world of difference!

I love our family, and love spending time in the village with them, and although I would rather not live in a mud hut, and I enjoy the comforts of running water, electricity, and comfortable furniture (there is just something about sitting on a comfy couch/sofa instead of a hard chair or a mat on the ground…), but if God called us to live in the village (in a mud hut or otherwise), I could quickly adjust, and die to all of those things.  But my greatest struggle would remain the language and the desire to communicate on a deeper level.

I still have some more dying to do, and some more learning how to live as a foreigner –not just in the village with my family, but learning FROM how they live, and choosing to live a life unpolluted by the world, wherever I am.


More on my experience and lessons learned in living in the village, next time!

Reader’s Favourites

Which Thief Will We Be Like? And How Will We Celebrate This Pivotal Christian Weekend?

I have been reading through the Gospels and seeing how Jesus proclaimed Himself to be God and proved it through His miracles and teaching. How He rebuked the man-centred religious system, and pointed to Himself throughout the scriptures (during His ministry and again after the resurrection) - He quoted the Old Testament, and spoke clearly of His coming death and resurrection, yet, even the 12 disciples didn’t understand until after the resurrection, what He had meant. BUT, one of the men who hung for their crimes, on a cross at Jesus’ side DID understand! He knew that Jesus was innocent and was not dying for His own sins, he knew and recognized his own guilt and sin deserving of death, AND he even recognized that Jesus was not going to remain dead, but would come into His Kingdom. He knew that the Kingdom was not of this world, and was not about setting up a throne to demolish the rule of Rome. Jesus came as fully God and fully man, to fulfil the numerous prophesies that fill the ...
Read more

¿Women Pastors?

I am writing this blog post for Christian women and for Church leaders - who believe that God’s written WORD (Genesis to Revelation) is the INSPIRED, God-BREATHED, INFALLIBLE, and UNCHANGING, and AUTHORITATIVE Word and command and instruction of God. We need to submit to the authority of God’s Word. Does the Bible permit women to be pastors or to preach? (Pastor/shepherd is a position of leadership and teaching and authority in the Church). If we don’t think biblically then we will default to thinking culturally; our culture would say that women should be pastors). An overview of womanhood starts in Genesis 1, where God created man male and female His image. Both male and female are essential to the full revelation of God’s glory. He didn’t just create man. Women have unique, special capacities both physically, mentally, and emotionally that are different from men. And we should celebrate the differences between manhood and womanhood. In Genesis we also see that it was the w...
Read more

“Palm Sunday”. Thinking about Worship, “social distancing” & examining ourselves and our Gospel message

Psalm 139:23, 24 “Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me and know my anxious thoughts; and see if there be any hurtful way in me, And lead me in the everlasting way.” 2 Corinthians 13:5 Test yourselves to see if you are in the faith; examine yourselves! Or do you not recognize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you--unless indeed you fail the test?  Jesus was welcomed into Jerusalem by a crowd full of people singing and rejoicing over miracles. When Nicodemus came to Jesus and said that they (the Jewish leaders) knew that He must be from God because of the signs/miracles, Jesus answered him, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God.” (John 3:3)  The Jewish people had been waiting for the Messiah, and the entire Old Testament is full of messianic prophesies - on the road to Emmeaus, after His resurrection, Jesus went through the entire scripture to teach that it was all about Himself. The mes...
Read more

Reflections on Rwanda from 2004

A City on A Hill Written by Charity Pilkey, January 2004, after visiting Rwanda ( the land of a thousand hills ) Teardrops falling on a thousand hills Somehow invisible Footprints marching on a thousand hills Somehow silent Bloodstains rolling on a thousand hills Somehow transparent Echoes crying on a thousand hills Somehow muffled Tears that fell, now fall from mourners Survivors march to make new prints Blood now dried, remains a vivid reminder New cries resound on a thousand hills So, if you are remaining Keep walking and learning Keep striving and yearning For His light to shine brilliantly From this land of a thousand hills.
Read more

If my Prayers Drew Blood

I have been looking through an old journal (2007) and have felt convicted to live out more of my past persuasion, and to not become complacent nor stagnant. Here is a note that I wrote about [imagination and] prayer, which I need to re-arrange my life to pursue more: "When one has an imagination like mine, it is often best not to to recall certain things, [like news] spoken second-hand. Yet, some thoughts and especially prayers must be suffered through. I wonder what thoughts, what painful knowledge was so burdened on Jesus that while praying, He was caused to bleed. AT TIMES I CHOOSE TO EVEN REFRAIN FROM PRAYING, ONLY TO SAVE MYSELF SOME REALLY INSIGNIFICANT PAIN, AND AT WHAT COST? If my prayers were so fervent that they actually drew blood then perhaps they would be more effective! "
Read more

More of life in the village - began writing in the village, and will slowly finish this week

As I sit here to write, I am surrounded by small children –some nephews, a little orphaned girl, and a great-nephew, plus some of my own children coming and going. I came to the church building to write, because the internet reception is better, the heat is not as intense, and I thought I would be alone – if I could speak the language I might ask them to leave for a little while, but I think that choosing love, and bearing the noise of all the “emotokars” (cars made of pieces of wood –that don’t resemble cars, but with an imagination and some good sound effects, they become perfect cars!)…in the time that it took to write that, they realized that I wasn’t looking at pictures or doing anything interesting, so they took their cars outside –but left a baby behind to play on the dirt floor. Actually, the floor is not dirt, it is made of cow dung. Here is Benjamin’s description of the [making of the] cow-dung floor: “I watched one of my cousins make a cow-poop-floor. First, they coll...
Read more

Life in the village, as a parable that points to Christ and to eternity

I have stepped out of the village for one week, and am spending time with my sister and her family in Kampala (with my 4 littles). Samuel is still in the village and working hard to finish a permanent brick house for our extended family there. We began this house 9 years ago, and it has been very slowly taking shape. Unfortunately, not much can be accomplished with any quality, without Samuel overseeing (even now, if he leaves a “professional” builder to work on one portion of the house, while he is on the other side, he can come back and find that no level has been used, and the work needs to be redone).   As I wrotelast time , I could die to certain life comforts, and would gladly count them a loss for Christ, but still struggle with being a foreigner with the language. We haven’t been called to live and minister long term in an African village (at this point in our lives). So, I am enjoying a visit with my sister before spending the next few weeks in the village and the...
Read more

Let us have grace. Grace for each other’s weaknesses. Grace for suffering and sin and even for the “walking-dead” among us.

I have been thinking about some of these things over the past several months, and now even more with COVID-19... But, the topic came to mind after recently having suffered through 2 early-term (under 6 weeks) miscarriages, both right before hosting missionary teams | my sister’s recent near death and continued struggle to fully recover | and then recently seeing school reports from  my little brother who was diagnosed with a meduloblastoma (brain tumour), after struggling in school and needing to be homeschooled (over 20 years ago!) |  also thinking of past and present struggles in my own life, family (and extended family), and friends (including experience with PTSD and special needs). 1 Corinthians 10:13   English Standard Version (ESV) “ No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man.  God is faithful, and  he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may...
Read more

Brave Heart (April 2007)

Brave Heart April 11, 2007 thoughts on faith, being brave, being strong and living a life of love. (imagining a stage, with light shining down, and mew, standing behind the curtain and peeking out, too afraid to step out). I cannot step through the curtain and into the light. Of myself, I cannot. But I know whom I believe in and HE is able.  I know that He did not take me out this far only to leave me. He is faithful and His Word will not return to Him void. I have fallen, but He will never let me stay down. He has healed me and saved me and will continue to use me for His glory.  I will advance in faith and commit my life to the Lord and allow Him to change me and to make me more like Himself -even when it hurts. My identity is in Christ and not in my ministry. I will seek Him and his Kingdom. I will pursue intimacy and fight the good fight. I will not quit, I will finish the race.  The vision that God has given me is so huge, so amazing -and it is not m...
Read more