Skip to main content

The Father-heart of God: a Definition

Having grown up hearing and learning the meaning of the “Father-heart of God”, I have never thought to sit and write a definition, until now as we prepare for a time of staff training (or envisioning). And as I have recently been told that the term didn’t make grammatical sense to someone -I wondered if it was our (mine and Samuel’s) Canadian, British and Ugandan language background, and similar church and training background that gave as a unique understanding of a term that maybe doesn’t actually makes sense? But when I googled it, mostly American blogs and studies came up - so American English uses the term too …but what does the term mean? That is what I want to write about here.

I am sitting in a coffee shop, thinking about the Father-heart of God, with headphones on. I felt compelled to listen to “How Great Thou Art” as I write and wish I could sing at the top of my voice while sitting here… thinking of all that it has ever meant to me and what it means now, the great truths and profound depths of love, hope, and ultimate identity stir worship in my heart.

Most of us know that one of the “names” or “titles” for God is “Father”. But have we taken the time to truly reflect on God’s HEART as our Father? We can come to God and call Him “Abba” or “Papa”. If we can call Him Abba then what does that in turn reveal about His heart AS Papa/Abba/Father/Daddy?

Jesus revealed the Father to us, and we in turn are Ambassadors of Christ -we are meant to reflect and reveal God’s heart, His Fatherhood, His Father-heart to the world.

How do I as a: daughter, sister, friend, wife, mother, neighbour, writer, teacher, missionary, leader, worshipper, singer, servant -how do I reflect and reveal the Father-heart of God?

I must first understand it -not theoretically, not philosophically, not theologically, but experientially.

I hope to express here, just a little, of what the term “Father-heart of God” means to me, of what truth I have learnt on my own journey of learning to know and experience the Father-heart of God…and, I am not there yet, not all the way, but below is some point form and some scriptures and questions for further study. I hope you will be encouraged to seek to know both what the term “Father-heart of God” means, and to experience the love and intimacy that is available to us, and to be shared in knowing God as our Father - experientially.

Aside from the truths learnt, I am not going to say too much about myself nor the circumstances that originally brought me to my first (and subsequent) experiences of knowing the Father-heart of God, except to say that in great pain, disillusionment, feelings of rejection, and confusion, in family and in church life, I first felt very deeply and was able to share in my 5th grade classroom, as a young girl, the fact that I knew deeply that God IS my Father, and that no matter what human failings I might observe,  no matter if those who taught me God’s Word completely lived out the truths of His Word (and ultimately none of us do completely, though we should strive to), that His Word IS true. He IS a Father to the fatherless. I learnt that profoundly, deeply, truly, at the age of 12. And I have been on a journey of growing and learning and experiencing the (inner-)healing that comes with that truth. …and not that God is ONLY Father -He is also Creator, Husband, Redeemer, Healer, Peace, Saviour, Sanctifier, and SO much more -but I think that because God created us to be in family and to learn, know and express identity in family, it is profoundly important to know Him as Father. Not to just know or even pray to the “name” Father, but to understand His heart as Father-God.

For a brief time before understanding God as my Father, and consequently, at times as I grew and matured in my walk, I experienced (to varying degrees) an “orphan-heart” (which, along with “Father-heart”, may be an unfamiliar term -but I will not go into that here). It is that “orphan-heart” that cries out to know and experience adoption, relationship, and identity in God as Father.

Who is God, as Father? What does His Word reveal to us about His Father-heart?
  • ·      Throughout the old testament we see God as a Father to Israel, one place that I love, is the graphic parable told by Ezekiel, of God finding Israel as an abandoned and bloody  baby girl, left in a field. It is His Father-heart that compels Him to go to save that baby girl -that nation – me- you.
  • ·      God the Father, is of course the Father of Jesus (both through the immaculate conception, and in eternal relationship – in the mystery of the Trinity, ONE God, but 3 distinct persons)…He shows His Father-heart TO Jesus, which is a revelation of His heart to us (2 examples in scripture are in Matthew 3:17 at Jesus’ baptism, in Matt. 17:5, at the transfiguration) :

o   The Father states about Jesus that He is, “My beloved Son in whom I am well pleased” and says to “listen to Him” - this shows some characteristics of God’s love for Jesus as His Son, and as He is our Father (along with other scriptures which confirm this) He has the same heart towards us as His children:  IDENTITY, APPROVAL,  LOVE
  • ·      We are constantly loved by our Father God
  • ·      He provides for us (daily food, presence, gifts, healing)
  • ·      He disciplines us
  • ·      He teaches us
  • ·      He offers forgiveness as our Father
  • ·      We have a HOPE and FUTURE because of His Father-heart
  • ·      When in a relationship with our Father-God, we are made perfect in His love and our fears are eliminated
  • ·      When we worship we experience the Father’s love
  • ·      When we GIVE love (in obedience and in relationship with Him), we also experience His love



There is so much more that I could say from experience, from observation, from learning, from research, and more importantly from God’s Word, but in conclusion here, maybe as more of a definition of the term itself: the “Father-heart of God” describes not only a characteristic, name, and position, but an intrinsic, innate nature and attitude.  Someone recently said something to me about my own “mother’s-heart” in relation to my son being away and probably missing him and longing to be with him. In the same way, God has a Father-heart toward me and you. Because God is GOD, and is I AM, and is revealed to us, as ONE God, made of THREE persons (Father, Son, and Holy Spirit), revealed with so many names/titles/characteristics He is not limited as I am, and is greater than I could ever express here, but I hope that at least explains the term (?)

Reader’s Favourites

Citizens of Heaven: reflections on how the lack of speaking and understanding a language make me a foreigner.

I have experienced life as a foreigner in varying degrees over the majority of my life, probably beginning on my first short term missions trip (to Uganda) 22 years ago (yes, 22 years…yikes!). I don’t recall feeling so much a foreigner on that trip, but I was changed, and became a distinct “foreigner” upon my return to Canada. I think it was then that I began to learn how to die to myself and began to desire to live out James 1:27 (in it’s entirety – I yearned to live out true religion by taking care of orphans and widows AND by remaining unpolluted by the secular world) *note: I am far from perfect, and simultaneously began a fight against sin, as once convicted of something, once one knows the good that they should do and they do not do it, they then sin… the struggle against the flesh is real, but with every victory, as sin is put to death and as I choose to live life in the Spirit, I am learning more and more how to live a life separate from the world.     ...
Read more

¿Women Pastors?

I am writing this blog post for Christian women and for Church leaders - who believe that God’s written WORD (Genesis to Revelation) is the INSPIRED, God-BREATHED, INFALLIBLE, and UNCHANGING, and AUTHORITATIVE Word and command and instruction of God. We need to submit to the authority of God’s Word. Does the Bible permit women to be pastors or to preach? (Pastor/shepherd is a position of leadership and teaching and authority in the Church). If we don’t think biblically then we will default to thinking culturally; our culture would say that women should be pastors). An overview of womanhood starts in Genesis 1, where God created man male and female His image. Both male and female are essential to the full revelation of God’s glory. He didn’t just create man. Women have unique, special capacities both physically, mentally, and emotionally that are different from men. And we should celebrate the differences between manhood and womanhood. In Genesis we also see that it was the w...
Read more

Reflections on Rwanda from 2004

A City on A Hill Written by Charity Pilkey, January 2004, after visiting Rwanda ( the land of a thousand hills ) Teardrops falling on a thousand hills Somehow invisible Footprints marching on a thousand hills Somehow silent Bloodstains rolling on a thousand hills Somehow transparent Echoes crying on a thousand hills Somehow muffled Tears that fell, now fall from mourners Survivors march to make new prints Blood now dried, remains a vivid reminder New cries resound on a thousand hills So, if you are remaining Keep walking and learning Keep striving and yearning For His light to shine brilliantly From this land of a thousand hills.
Read more

Hope for those in the "depths of despair"

I should be packing for a missions trip right now, but instead I am sitting down with a storied glass of wine and opera music. I am not accustomed to listening to opera, although I think I have enjoyed it most of my life. It can soothe the emotional side of the soul, but can also dangerously feed into certain emotions - I think (dependent on lyrics maybe too). But alas, I am inclined to listen to a few songs right now, before switching to my usual playlist -  as I reflect on recent news of those in my circle of friends who are mourning loss and questioning life, as someone they know has chosen to take their own life.  The decision to take one’s own life has affected my family very personally, as have other choices which inevitably lead to the ending of life. It makes me reflect on my own life, on the subject of depression, and of my own personal experience with depression. I have so many thoughts on this subject and have read numerous books on the topic, my favo...
Read more

If my Prayers Drew Blood

I have been looking through an old journal (2007) and have felt convicted to live out more of my past persuasion, and to not become complacent nor stagnant. Here is a note that I wrote about [imagination and] prayer, which I need to re-arrange my life to pursue more: "When one has an imagination like mine, it is often best not to to recall certain things, [like news] spoken second-hand. Yet, some thoughts and especially prayers must be suffered through. I wonder what thoughts, what painful knowledge was so burdened on Jesus that while praying, He was caused to bleed. AT TIMES I CHOOSE TO EVEN REFRAIN FROM PRAYING, ONLY TO SAVE MYSELF SOME REALLY INSIGNIFICANT PAIN, AND AT WHAT COST? If my prayers were so fervent that they actually drew blood then perhaps they would be more effective! "
Read more

More of life in the village - began writing in the village, and will slowly finish this week

As I sit here to write, I am surrounded by small children –some nephews, a little orphaned girl, and a great-nephew, plus some of my own children coming and going. I came to the church building to write, because the internet reception is better, the heat is not as intense, and I thought I would be alone – if I could speak the language I might ask them to leave for a little while, but I think that choosing love, and bearing the noise of all the “emotokars” (cars made of pieces of wood –that don’t resemble cars, but with an imagination and some good sound effects, they become perfect cars!)…in the time that it took to write that, they realized that I wasn’t looking at pictures or doing anything interesting, so they took their cars outside –but left a baby behind to play on the dirt floor. Actually, the floor is not dirt, it is made of cow dung. Here is Benjamin’s description of the [making of the] cow-dung floor: “I watched one of my cousins make a cow-poop-floor. First, they coll...
Read more

Life in the village, as a parable that points to Christ and to eternity

I have stepped out of the village for one week, and am spending time with my sister and her family in Kampala (with my 4 littles). Samuel is still in the village and working hard to finish a permanent brick house for our extended family there. We began this house 9 years ago, and it has been very slowly taking shape. Unfortunately, not much can be accomplished with any quality, without Samuel overseeing (even now, if he leaves a “professional” builder to work on one portion of the house, while he is on the other side, he can come back and find that no level has been used, and the work needs to be redone).   As I wrotelast time , I could die to certain life comforts, and would gladly count them a loss for Christ, but still struggle with being a foreigner with the language. We haven’t been called to live and minister long term in an African village (at this point in our lives). So, I am enjoying a visit with my sister before spending the next few weeks in the village and the...
Read more

Let us have grace. Grace for each other’s weaknesses. Grace for suffering and sin and even for the “walking-dead” among us.

I have been thinking about some of these things over the past several months, and now even more with COVID-19... But, the topic came to mind after recently having suffered through 2 early-term (under 6 weeks) miscarriages, both right before hosting missionary teams | my sister’s recent near death and continued struggle to fully recover | and then recently seeing school reports from  my little brother who was diagnosed with a meduloblastoma (brain tumour), after struggling in school and needing to be homeschooled (over 20 years ago!) |  also thinking of past and present struggles in my own life, family (and extended family), and friends (including experience with PTSD and special needs). 1 Corinthians 10:13   English Standard Version (ESV) “ No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man.  God is faithful, and  he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may...
Read more

Angels and Demons - waking to an African War Cry in the village

The New testament of the Bible retells several stories of Jesus casting out demons, and also of visitations by angels. The demonic is something that Christians in North America oft stay away from, and I have never written about my own experiences with seeing the power of God triumph over evil, although many have heard me tell at least one story of an encounter with the enemy, and seeing the power of God displayed with the Sword of the Spirit, which IS the Word of God… Now that we have recently returned from Uganda, and we were retelling one story, I have decided to post some of the story here. This is not a theological debate, nor even the complete story (with all of its details), but is my own personal experience with a recent spiritual battle, and some of the truths of God’s Word which I was impressed to read during this battle. It was late one evening, in our village home in Uganda. The children and I had gone to bed early compared to the rest of the family, who normally ...
Read more

Which Thief Will We Be Like? And How Will We Celebrate This Pivotal Christian Weekend?

I have been reading through the Gospels and seeing how Jesus proclaimed Himself to be God and proved it through His miracles and teaching. How He rebuked the man-centred religious system, and pointed to Himself throughout the scriptures (during His ministry and again after the resurrection) - He quoted the Old Testament, and spoke clearly of His coming death and resurrection, yet, even the 12 disciples didn’t understand until after the resurrection, what He had meant. BUT, one of the men who hung for their crimes, on a cross at Jesus’ side DID understand! He knew that Jesus was innocent and was not dying for His own sins, he knew and recognized his own guilt and sin deserving of death, AND he even recognized that Jesus was not going to remain dead, but would come into His Kingdom. He knew that the Kingdom was not of this world, and was not about setting up a throne to demolish the rule of Rome. Jesus came as fully God and fully man, to fulfil the numerous prophesies that fill the ...
Read more